“I have a clutch of students who read for pleasure, yet bizarrely hand in assignments only sporadically. Let’s call them “Readers.” These are the kids who take home The Kite Runner and read the whole thing in two days—then never write any of their journal responses. Their grades do not reflect their abilities. However, these students always score at or near the very top of the class on these standardized tests.”  

This hints at an even deeper gift that these students have – one that feeds their love of reading – and that is the innate (or is it taught? modeled? suggested?) gift of CURIOSITY. These people do not read because they have to – “have to” doesn’t factor in that heavily if they are not writing their journal responses and earning poor grades. They are reading because of something else. That SOMETHING is also leading them to score at the top of these assesments that Mr. Brown refers to. Freedom of thought, freedom from the slavish “do only what you are told to do and nothing more” and a freedom to pursue knowledge and adventure (what else?) through books fuels these students’ success. As a parent, how do you foster CURIOSITY?

 - Heather

Working at home with our children, we, as parents, face the age-old dilemma. Doing things the way we know is “right” is much more difficult than taking the ‘easy’ route, a route taken by many others. If we are going to follow the “road less traveled,” we must put on the appropriate hiking boots. Having firmly fixed, high expectations for our childrens’ performance (as well as for their good character) definitely helps during trying times when the pull of commonplace diversions, peer pressure, and the kids’ desires threatens to blow us off course.

One exercise that is helpful within the family is to make those expectations, as well as the reasons for them, clear to the kids. Involve them in a family meeting, where parents can discuss short and long term goals for learning and behavior, and the rationalization behind them. Likewise, this is an opportunity for the kids to formulate and record their own goals, evaluate how they perceive their performance, and ask questions about parents’ goals and objectives. Bringing kids “into the fold” ensures that they not only understand your high expectations, but it encourages that they “buy in” to the entire process.

As this school year begins, what time is better than now to sit down with your kids and have that family meeting?

-Heather

1. We are driving 9 hours with three kids, and we have decided to leave all electronic devices at home. We are going “unplugged” for two weeks. For me, this is wonderful. I work from home and am attached to a laptop more than I’d like. My husband, who is in IT, feels the same. But on the long ‘legs’ of our trip with the kids, will we regret the lack of Leapster, the dearth of DVD’s? In theory, I want them to stay ‘in the now’ and find new ways to entertain themselves. Everyone got a new book last week for the trip, and I bought three portable white boards. I’m also going to invest in some pipecleaners (kids love to make stuff from pipecleaners, and I’ve found them to be ‘magic’ during any long trip). These, plus games they make up (the latest is called “MINE!” where they look for yellow cars and whoever sees them first gets points), are all I have in my bag of tricks. I may regret this. I may not. We’ll see. (Don’t get me wrong, my kids do not spend a lot of time ‘plugged in’ at home; I just wonder if the bickering will get to me, or whether the forced time together will elicit “greater sibling to sibling tolerance” – is this a pipe (cleaner) dream?)

2. We are cutting costs and making the trip one that is ‘closer to nature’ by camping. We’re not camping the entire two weeks, I have combined camping stays with hotel stays so that we all have a break (and laundry, and a bed) every couple of days. I have camped plenty, but never with my three young kids. Our last camping plans got rained out by a hurricane. Before then, we only had two kids and one was in the tent in a pack-and-play. So needless to say, this will be a new experience. Will I crawl into the car at night? Will my third be scared if we have a thunderstorm (YES)? Will I generally regret this seemingly-sound decision?

I’d love to hear from brave parents who have underaken this type of endeavor. I know that the trip will offer unbounded opportunities for my kids to learn about different cultures, languages, foreign money, city life, the outdoors, and more. The kids always have developmental (intellectual) ‘growth spurts’ after trips and experiences that are so new to them – that is probably the single most motivating factor for me – the chance to witness that.

- Heather

Q: After all we’ve learned about the mind and brain, why is it so difficult to make school enjoyable for students?

A: School is all about mental challenge, and that is hard work, make no mistake. Still, people do enjoy mental work or, more exactly, people enjoy successful mental work. We get a snap of satisfaction when we solve a problem. But solving a problem that is trivially easy is not fun. Neither is hammering away at a problem with no sense you are making progress.

So the challenge for a teacher is to find that sweet spot of mental difficulty, and to find it simultaneously for 25 students, each with a different level of preparation. To fight this problem, teachers must engage each student with work that is appropriate for his or her level of preparation. This must be done sensitively, so that students who are behind don’t feel like second-class citizens. But the fact is they are behind, and pretending that they are not does them no favors.

For parents who are working with their children, the problem of meeting the needs of 25 is not relevant; however, sometimes the problem of perspective is. When does a parent know that their child is exceeding expectations? How does a parent know when a child is struggling – do we all have tunnel vision when it comes to our own children? I would love to hear from other parents on this issue.

Sometimes when I am working with my 9 year old on his writing, I think that while he is bright and knowledgeable, this is not shining through as much in writing as in other areas. But when I see his writing compared to others of his age group, I feel reassured that he is progressing at a decent pace. I guess my question to other parents is, how much of what we expect our kids to do comes from our personal knowledge of them as individuals and their capabilities, and how much of it comes from what we expect from any child of their particular age group?

- Heather

- Heather

When I conduct presentations for museum educators (link takes you to the most recent), they are usually centered around how they can engage the school audience and meet the needs of teachers and schools. I also make it a point to emphasize the importance of engaging alternative audiences such as independent schools, home schoolers, and scouting groups and clubs. If you are involved in such groups, you know that they have more flexibility and autonomy to engage in the community than do public schools.

My question to parents is, how do you view museums and other community ‘assets’? Do they meet your needs or do they leave something to be desired? Do you see them as a vehicle for learning for your children? Have you seen great partnerships between schools or homeschool groups and museums and cultural centers?

I’d love to read your input!

- Heather

Certainly, we all have gifts, and in some ways it is very destructive to the self esteem to divvy kids up according to abilities. On the other hand, if you are a parent of a child whose learning needs lie outside the ‘regular’ classroom, you know that individual learning needs on the ‘upper’ end of the ability spectrum are as important to meet as those at the ‘lower’ end of that spectrum.

What is ‘gifted’ to you? Do you think the label is helpful or divisive?